In Mother Russia Blog Reads You!

This isn't a full blog post, just wanted everyone to know that this site: Яндекс is the second highest referring site to my blog. I don't understand it either. Clearly, there's not nearly enough of you out there breaking the first rule of Fight Club.

Maybe This Can Hold You Over Until the Inevitable Reboot

OK, the special effects are hideous (even for a mid-90's Roger Corman film), and it's about as campy as the original 1960's comics, but I still enjoy this movie. Sue me.  The acting in it wasn't stellar, but it wasn't really bad either. It's reported that this movie was only made so it's production company could keep the rights to it for another five years and if that's the case, they did a pretty good job on their 5 dollar budget. Plus, they didn't take a classic villain that was just begging to be made into a movie character and completely destroy him. Like some other movies I could link to.




*SPOILER(S) AHEAD!* 

What The Hell Was That?

or, if you prefer,

  

Okay, let's not mince words: This year's Super Bowl Halftime show was a travesty.

There's really not a whole lot more to say but I will, for your sake Dear Readers, press onward. I know that lots of you are probably hoping that I take a few swipes at the National Anthem debacle but, seriously guys, it's been done.

No. This hasn't been done before. No one in America has complained about the Halftime show until this very moment!

Right from the get go I should tell you that I'm a mild fan of The Black Eyed Peas. Some of their songs are actually pleasing to my delicate ears and, I have to admit, that Fergie Fergie is quite the looker. So I was a little bit excited to see what they could offer. I would now, very much so, like to rescind that excitement. Also, if you wouldn't mind, I'd like to replace it with dread.

What Has Two Thumbs and Will Consume ALL of your Free Time?

For the longest time, in order to share the fun stuff you found on the Interwebs, you'd have to either send an     e-mail, send an IM, or (GASP!) actually communicate verbally to your friends and loved ones. Thankfully there is a shining beacon of hope that has come to free us of the dreary act of talking to one another, or actually using the Internet for something productive and helpful. That beacon is StumbleUpon. Do you enjoy sleep? I hope not, because once you install this bad boy you'll never get to R.E.M. R.E.M. again.

Insidious Canadian Plot to Destroy American Productivity Revealed!

It is a sad but true fact that most Americans are almost totally ignorant of Canadian culture. Sure the Gen-X kids remember You Can't Do That on Television, The Kids in the Hall, and maybe SCTV but that's really about it. When it comes to music, it's even worse. Try this exercise:

As fast as you can, name five Canadian musical acts. GO!

Let me guess:

1. Ryan Adams
2. Rush
3. Alanis Morrisette
4. Bare Naked Ladies
5. Celine Dion (Canada owes us for taking her in, by the way)

However, there's a new storm on the Northern Horizon. A dastardly plot that will single handedly destroy all aspects of American society.

Canadian Conspiracy Theories Are Amusing

Since I recently completed a marathon stint in the Great White North I decided to make this week all about Canada. The first thing you'll notice about Canada is that it's just like the U.S., except cleaner and more polite. Also, everything is in French and English instead of Spanish and English. The second thing you'll notice, if you're anything like me,  is that there's a line two miles 3.22 kilometers long outside of a coffee shop called Tim Hortons.

Something Wicked This Way Comes



My good friend over at The Kitchenette has cajoled me into writing with her again. This is a good thing for a number of reasons:

1. I'm sure that a society deprived of my acerbic wit is a society more likely to hate kittens

-and-

2. I need something to do besides play video games and read comic books [FULL DISCLOSURE: This is mainly Mrs. Attack Resistance's opinion]

As such I'm planning a bit of a come back. I hope to be able to keep going for more than a couple of weeks this time, but video games and comic books are pretty time consuming, so please don't judge me if I disappear again. Also, stop hating kittens. You know what kind of person hates kittens? This guy.



Holy Crap! Judge Reinhold and William Zabka In One Film?!

OK, here are the two biggest problems with this movie: Judge Reinhold and the sibling sub-plot. Nothing against Judge Reinhold, he's a decent enough actor when it comes to lighter fare like fathers inhabiting their sons bodies or flinging coffee into a robbers face but in this film we're expected to believe that Judge Reinhold is an ex-Black Ops Officer? Can't do it; my apologies. Knowing that Judge took this role to pay the rent and get a free trip to Bulgaria makes it a bit more forgivable from his point of view, but the casting director really should have gone for a younger, more athletic B-movie actor, like Antonio Sabato Jr. Sorry Mr. Reinhold, no hard feelings. Things are looking up for good ol' Judge, however, because he's got at least 14 more Santa Clause movies he can do with Tim Allen and Eddie Murphy is trying to revisit a time in his career when he was still relevant by going forward with Beverly Hills Cop IV.

Man Cannot Live By Bread Alone

This post was supposed to have appeared on Monday but, in its infinite wisdom, Blogspot chose not to display it. Therefore you get a fun little Thursday evening post. You're welcome.

While I was playing lots of video games on sabbatical I had to find a suitable yet quick meal to prepare for myself and Future Mrs. Attack Resistance. Her mother had recently purchased a box of Thai Kitchen Original Pad Thai Stir-Fry Rice Noodles With Sauce. It should be noted that ordinarily we avoid these boxed meals and instead opt for food that is as unprocessed as possible, but this was there and I hadn't been to the store in a while so I opted for the easy way out. Was it good? Was it bad? Did we violate anyone's closely held personal values? Read on to find out!

Who You Gonna Call? Vodka Makers!

Today, I'd like to do something a reviewer is never, ever supposed to do: I'm going to endorse a product without ever having tried it.

Some of you may say, "Who cares? Only three people read this thing anyway." To which I can only reply that I know of at least 5 people that read this blog. So suck it. What amazing doodad is out there that would make me say, "YES! BUY IT NOW!" without ever laying eyes on it? What wonderful invention of the human mind could be so mind blowing as to force me to give up what small shred of journalistic integrity I have? Ladies and gentlemen it is a product unlike no other. A concoction that knows no equal. A legal recreational consumable with the single greatest celebrity sponsor in the known world...